Can a Deaf Man Get Some Love?

Dear Ms. HeartBeat:
For the past 15 years I have been single. I tried dating but it seems when people get to know me, all they want to do is be friends. Being a nice guy I guess that will happen. It seems all women want these days is looks or money from a brother or a “bad boy” image. It doesn’t help none that I have a handicap (I’m deaf). Maybe that turns women off? I am a very nice guy that would enjoy a meaningful relationship. What are women looking for in a man these days? Or maybe I should look into myself and see what I’m doing wrong? I don’t do drugs or drink or hang out with the “guys.” All I want to do is give someone my heart 24 hours a day. Your advice will be appreciated.

Signed,
Emotional Dreaming

Dear Emotional:
I like your approach and willingness to look at this issue from all sides. I was doing some thinking and wonder if perhaps the women you are pursing are similar in type, and these types are not finding you appropriate for whatever reason they have. Younger women tend to be more focused on either a man’s financial status (ability to take care of them in grand style), or his looks and sexiness.

These are things that can be changed easily by working out at the gym to build up muscle, a trip to a hair stylist for a new look, maybe growing an attractive beard or mustache, and a little revamping of the wardrobe. You may have to start broadening your horizons and consider women that are a few years older than you are, of different races, etc.

The fact that you are deaf may be indeed be a turnoff for some women. However, I believe most likely the women feel uncomfortable and don’t know what to say to you, how to say it, or how to comfortably interact with a hearing impaired gentleman. When people feel inadequate they usually avoid the situation or person that causes it.

So let’s start with the outside and work our way in. After you get the things above accomplished, write me back and we can figure out some ways for you to meet women you can date, okay?

MsHeartBeat

Relationship and dating advice columnist of Ask HeartBeat! Has enjoyed dishing out insightful yet hilariously funny advice, tersely worded reality checks and "let me slap you upside the head" wake up calls to men and women around the globe since 1991.