How to Avoid Having a Summer Fling

While it may seem pretty simple to understand why women who are lonely and seeking any form of affection from the opposite sex routinely find themselves having non-committed sexual flings, flings themselves are still detrimental to the psyche. 

With the weather warming up and women across the country finalizing their travel plans to exotic locales with their bikinis in tow, here are 5 surefire tips to avoiding those dreaded hook-ups all year long.

1. BELIEVE that you are enough. Even if you’re single, divorced, widowed or fit into another category trust that you are precious enough to warrant the best and be treated with respect in whatever relationship or friendship you encounter. It doesn’t matter how good looking he or she is, if you don’t believe in yourself, and honor your own worth, nobody will.

2. THINK and be rational. Life is nothing like the movies so don’t be so quick to romanticize everything you see, feel, taste and hear. He or she may be attractive under the moonlight after two tropical drinks, but your first question should always be, “what do truly you know about this person you’re meeting?” Put on your high beams, take the time to process everything that’s going on around you—remember to always take it slow and never rush into anything or allow anymore to pressure you into making a decision on the spot.

3. LISTEN to your inner voice; it’s the voice we mostly ignore and it lands us in a heap of trouble time and time again when we dismiss it. Learn to read between the lines and listen to what he or she is NOT saying as well as what they are saying. People want to sell themselves, but we need to lift them up and see what makes them tick. If you hear or see something that sends up a red flag—heed the warning. When all else fails remind yourself of what your mother would say in a situation like this—she’s probably right.

4. SEPARATE your feelings from having a good time. One has nothing to do with the other. In an instance where you two have just met, do not allow the oceans waves, a good meal, a sultry voice or a gentle caress to sway you into believing the experience is something that its not. After a night of pillow talk and tenderness many men and women wake up to find out their cars, credit cards and jewelry have been stolen. If the experience is more than a “fling” only time will tell. You both had individual lives before you met and will continue to after it ends.

5. ACCOUNTABILITY PARTNER. If you don’t have one, now is a good time to find someone who will agree in advance not to coddle you or allow you to act emotionally, physically or sexually reckless in public or in private. Never go it alone—be it vacations, private events or a dinner party, always take your accountability partner along with you—they’ll come in handy and most of all you won’t wake up with those dreaded morning after regrets.
 

©2009 Linda Dominique Grosvenor and AskHeartBeat.Com. All distribution and duplication rights reserved. Linda has made her foray into non-fiction with the inspirational smash hit The Plural Thing: Spiritually Preparing for Your Soul Mate. The author of several popular novels including the page turning sizzler about summer flings The Hamptons, she maintains a pop culture blog at PrincessDominique.com/blog. Visit her at http://www.LindaDominiqueGrosvenor.com

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