What Kind of Relationship Is This?

Dear Ms. HeartBeat:
I’m just so confused about the whole situation with us. I care for him deeply, but I feel like he doesn’t feel the same way about me. I think about him all the time and wonder what he’s up to. Yet I have this feeling that it’s not the same with him.

We never went out, but he has told me that he does want to go out with me. All we do is have sex, and after that we either go to sleep or go to the carryout for a snack. What type of relationship is that?

We were never boyfriend and girlfriend back in the day, we would pretty much just get up with each other and "get it on" and leave it at that.

I ran into him again a few months ago and it seems like all we did was just pick up where we left off. I want more out of this but I don’t wanna be made a fool of at the same time. I honestly do not think he want to be with me in that manner.

I’ve never met his friends, or family and he has never asked me about my friends or family.

So are we together or is this just a f**k buddy type of thing? This hurts me because I have feelings for him and I haven’t a clue if he’s even INTO me. What should I do??

Ms. HeartBeat Responds:
Haven’t a clue? You wanna play super stupid, because there are plenty of clues all over the place!

Since you wanna play stupid like you don’t know what time it is, let me point you towards my book Sucka Free Love! which clearly explains the difference between dating, friend with benefits, a committed relationship and a booty call.

In your case, you have developed feelings about a man who saw you as nothing but a booty call and who never wanted anything more from you than sex. You are not his girlfriend and never have been. He has no emotional attachment to you and never has had one. You have no relationship and never have had a relationship. You willingly placed yourself in the position to share your body with a man with no strings attached, no love, no expectations.

So now if you want something else, you need to stop messing around wasting time with him, and get clear on the type of relationship you want for yourself. Then you go out and find a guy that wants the same thing you do.

Never, ever settle for less than what you want.

MsHeartBeat

Relationship and dating advice columnist of Ask HeartBeat! Has enjoyed dishing out insightful yet hilariously funny advice, tersely worded reality checks and "let me slap you upside the head" wake up calls to men and women around the globe since 1991.